ALAS NO GAS

I've got money in my pockets, dollars in every drawer, nickels, dimes and quarters by the score. I've got packs of pennies and credit cards galore, but I can't afford the gas to get me to the corner store,

I've got sweets and meat and cheese to eat, clothes to wear and shoes to spare and booze to drink and soaps to wash myself when I stink, but I ain't got the cash to buy the gas,

C'mon, Georgie, be a pal, cut in half the price a gal or we'll boil you in your daddy's oil. We ain't got the green for gasoline, y'know what I mean.