Sunday, May 01, 2005

JUST ASKING

When I am lonely and alone my companion is my telephone 1-800s are there for me in answer to my inquire with offers too good to ignore from the on-line bargain store.

I ask questions endlessly. The cost, the cash-back guarantee Please tell me can I buy it on the installment plan? The deal is great, the price is right. Can you ship it overnight? If I don't like it will you take it back? And a lot more of that yackity-yack. What? You want my address? My e-mail and my IRS?. When was I born? And where? Does anybody really care? Do I like sports in jockey-shorts? Do I have sex, if so, what sorts?

Am I straight or am I gay or do I like it either way? Do I have something to confess? Answer NO or answer YES. If "NO" is how I replied, you ask what have I got to hide? I'll make a list and give it to my therapist.

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