GOD IS DEAD!
By The Late Walter Cronkwrite
Special to The Heavenly Times
All hell broke loose on Earth tonight as word came down from on high that that good old guy we all called God passed away today.
Speculation raged throughout civilization: who'll rule Heaven now that He's gone? Who'll replace His grace? Catholics hope it will be an ex-pope. The born again say, "Nope! It'll be one of our men."
"Why not a loyal lesbian?" asked a gay. "That's OK as long as she' black," a black shot back.
Said an Oriental: "Let her be Chinese, Japanese or Korean? Or any Asian, but never again a Caucasian."
Then a voice in the crowd said aloud: "I'm not a Semite but might I suggest a Jew? In the beginning when the world was new who did God turn to? A Jew. And a rabbi, too."