WILL MAN EVER LIVE FOREVER?

Is it possible someday man will survive for an eternity, endure years of Walmart shopping, trips to Sears, perhaps to Gaps and other tourist traps and eating supersize fries and ten toppings pizza pies and winning the Nobel prize for inventing a cure for growing old?.

Will he be so clever that he'll ever live forever, never come down with the flu or other things most mortals do or take a wonder drug that kills the bug and keeps him wealthier and healthier than Methuselah on Medicare?

But what's the point of endless life that outlives all the lovers you knew when you were just a kid of ninety-two? Could you still choke on a chicken bone, a peach or cherry stone while prone, talking on the telephone licking an icecream cone? And when you stop to take a breath you stick the icecream in your ear and freeze to death.

This I know: I ain't sold on living long, knowing things can still go wrong like choking on my sweet's sarong or being bonged by a ding-dong singing a
rapper song. Even though I can't get sick a quirk of fate can do the trick. And while I wait at St. Pete's gate God turns me down and says He'll
see me in a thousand years. And here's the word of the Lord: "Spit up that bone, get that cone out of your ear. A klutz like you ain't welcome here."

You can have longevity. Me, I'll opt for brevity. And who can tell? Maybe hell will welcome me.