PETS BROWNERY SPOILS GREENERY

An undeclared declaration of war exists between humans and various animal species who dump clumps of facies here and there and everywhere for all to see and smell.

We’re mad as hell because their brownery spoils millions of miles of greenery and multi-colored scenery as we slave to save our planet from pollution their behind leaves behind.

I know when they gotta go they gotta go and so do we. We’ve got various outlets for what we let out, but they haven’t even got a chamber pot to catch their droppings.

I don’t blame our four-legged friends for what they do to dispose of their doo-doo. They don’t have a faciliy or the ability to delay excretion of the excrement. As far as I know, most animals are colorblind so don’t mind the brown littering our town.

What I suggest would be the best way to solve the situation and preserve our greening nation would be a network of comfort stations for the animal population.It would include trees for dogs individual boxes of sand for cats, traps for rats and urination stations for animals who choose to use them.

Getting animals to patronize and use them will take a bit of training, but they will be greatly appreciated when it’s snowing or it’s raining, Once they know there are features just for creatures---all you can gnaw steak bone bars for dogs, milk for cats, assorted foods for other broods. They’ll be patronized and prized by pets from coast to coast.

There will be grounds for pets to run, have fun, meet mates and congregate. Owners will have a lot of pet talk to brag about and some will make a late night date at the nearby singles mingles bar.