Saturday, November 28, 2009


Is compassion out of fashion? Is passion wearing thin? Is caring overbearing? Has love lost its lure? To be sure, let’s surmise there’s a prize for the man or woman who can best pass the test of this and other matters of the heart.

Perhaps only fools would get involved in trying to solve these complex emotions that hex sexual relations, regardless of the combinations and the games they play along the way.

Like scrabble, love’s just a lot of words without much meaning. Monopoly’s played with phony money that buys lots of lots and worthless real estate.

The lovers played Scrabble for a spell. The game didn’t go too well. They found love on their board, but the four-letter word did not define what they had in mind. In a word. they were bored by the Scrabble board.

Then they tried Monopoly, trying to buy castles in the sky where they could kiss, do that and this, make love and maybe make a baby.

But as one lover stated to her honey, ‘’You can’t buy baby booties and shoes with Monopoly money.” That shattering news made them blue and they stopped doing what lovers usually do.

Now they go to bed each night, turn out the lights and play solitaire in their underwear.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009


Ever since my momma and my poppa clinged together, ding-a-linged together, did this thing together and she pingedf and he popped, then he flopped off top and momma said "Don't stop!" But poppa was already snoring like a grizzly bear. Guess he didn't want any more.

Momma said again, "Don't stop!" Poppa woke up, asked, "Who are you, a traffic cop?" The creep went back to sleep. Momma sighed. "At least he tried. Maybe we made a baby, Now my insides must decide." He turned left. She turned right. Poppa said. "Turn off the light! Go to sleep!"

Momma kissed poppa on the ear. "Goodnight, my dear." Poppa didn't hear. Nine months later they had a son. Job well done.

Friday, November 20, 2009


I gaze into the midnight sky, amazed at what my eyes reveal to me. I realize that what I see is just a figment of infinity, the mystery and majesty that stares back at me.

I see a sea of stars far away, yet near enough so I can observe a single twinkling terrestrial world of wonder looking down at me. I have no inkling how the star got there or why I’m here.

If there’s intelligence elsewhere in the universe, are there beings just like me seeing what I see, wondering how this all came to be?

I believe in imagination, the motivation that inspires creation, and a mind to put it all in motion.

A notion to conceive an ocean, to excavate spans of land and mountains of sand, to turn fields of tangled vegetation into mighty nations with teeming, ever expanding and demanding civilizations, populations with complex systems of communications. Create fish and unlimited drops of water for them to swim and swish in and produce minnows to grow so fishermen will have batches of fish to catch and provide seafood to satisfy appetites with epicurean delights.

There must be land to stand upon, lots of lots for parking lots, roads and streets, real estate and factories, pool halls, shopping malls and slums where theieves prey night and day on the working poor and insecure.

It’s hard to believe this whole complicated place in empty space was conceived and created by the dedicated will and skill of a sainted soul.

This we know because the Bible says it’s so. Until science comes up with a better explanation, we’ll credit He who said it--- God, the master of Creation.

Friday, November 13, 2009

The Day My Wife Birthed Larry

The day my wife birthed Larry, my son, I knew that I was the lucky one. Over the years, this has been proven true. Let me tell the story of Lawrence Scott Weiland to you. I’m sure you’ll agree with me in what
I have to say today about my pride and joy, my birthday boy.
When Larry was about three or four I took him to a candy store to spend two pennies he had earned. That’s when he learned how how to make a deal and the power of money in the marketplace. The store was filled with customers, but Larry, undismayed, made his first deal. He banged his pennies on the counter repeatedly insistently,“MISS! MISS! MISS!”

A clerk responded to his demand. With the pennies clutched in his stretched out hand, Larry pointed to a candy bar, asked: “How much?” The clerk replied: “Five pennies.” My son looked at me pleadingly. I had no change, just two twenties and a credit card.
A customer saw my plight, gave my son a shiny dime, and walked away. “How ‘bout this?” Larry asked. The clerk took the dime, smiled, gave Larry five pennies change. The wheeler-dealer left the store, richer than before, eating a bargain candy bar.

My young financier went on to bigger, more profitable deals, his own expanding
newspaper route, cutting grass and outsourcing jobs he couldn’t handle, briefly as a diner busboy, then full time cook, a restaurant manager, franchisee owner and today, a top executive of the Golden Coral restaurant chain.

This is the story of a successful son anyone would be proud to claim. His name is just plain Larry to his friends.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Obama Dreaded Where We Were Headed

There was a time when decent , well meaning private citizens of good intent sincerely believed America was “not ready” for a black president.

Then an intelligent, persistent Democrat “man of color” who knew where America was at and dreaded where it was headed.
His time and opportunity to save the nation from distress was now or never if ever a black could prove able to clean up the mess left by an incompetant, anyone Christian, white and not so bright was good enough to handle (or mishandle) the tough job as the most powerful and influential (and incidentally, president) leader of the free world.

The Democratic Party had the foresight to help a bright new face to rewrite history and prove the fallacy of the fear that a black American could provide the imputes to end the world’s slide from recession into depression.

Barack Obama became the Democrat candidate. He offered a chance for change of a whole range of failed GOP policies and from Inauguration Day-plus. One, he has worked to get the job done. He cleared up flaws and made changes in laws because they were wrong and most of America agreed. They helped impede the slide and assure his administration will suceed.
Recovery has begun, but one thing seems to bedevil the dreams the President has for his contingency.

The president cannot avoid the problem of the unemployed. He has improved the nation’s occupation situation in some small ways. But is it possible with so much on his plate the obvious has escaped his attention.
The one subject that has not gotten adequate concern since the convention is the unemployment situation. Other than providing additional compensation little has been done.

There are thousands of essential potential jobs to be filled. Skilled and unskilled, they wait to fill the gap.
Is it possible President Obama can’t see the forest for the trees.

There are bridges falling down, crumbling roads all around, schools everywhere in need of repair, flood prevention calling for more attention, tornadoes, hurricanes and torrential rains, earth quakes that come and go and leave destruction in their wake.

These natural tragedies cause miseries, but they also make work from which we can not shirk. Every cent spent repairing the aftermath of natural events puts more dollars in circulation.

Paychecks upgrade the economy. Business big and small survive. The nation comes alive, Obamma’s met his goal. The economy is on a roll.

Saturday, November 07, 2009


In the peace that followed World War II the fear soon arose, who will be the first to blow up who with an A-bomb like the one that nearly leveled Tokyo?

So We and They and, eventually those and Them and all the would-be worrying warriors and money hungry industries who wondered, “What’s another war worth to my industry if World War III is meant to be?”

Thus, for all the We’s and They’s and the Wannabees, near and far, big and small, competed in the heated race to conquer space and stockpiled weapons to destroy the human race. But after millions of trillions were spent and events of no worldwide consequent came and went except for inept acts of butchery in the Middle East, Israel and Viet Nam, Korea, Iraq, Iran, Afghanistan and civil conflagrations in Third World Nations and all sorts of sordid slaughter here, there and everywhere, plus drug cartels, hear tell, are richer than Bill Gates and Arab states.

Peace remains right as rain with hurricanes, tornadoes and with Wall Street lows the whole damn world grows weary of economic woes and who knows what will happen next and what effect it will have on the future of humanity.

So here sits Earth that ain’t worth half of what it was beforeGeorge Bush began to mind the store and Obama took on the chore to restore what GWB and the GOP left right behind.

Yes, the world, and especially the US, are in a stressful mess. But keep the faith. Barack will bring us back.